So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
