THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
