and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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