...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
