went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
