we need to drink 2009 down the drain
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You've changed since you got that strap on
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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