Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
