I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
