So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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