If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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