That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
