He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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