wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
