And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
