So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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