do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
