I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
