Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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