someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
