I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
