so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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