what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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