Barsexuality is the new black.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
