Got a toothbrush?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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