So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
