If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Randomize
