Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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