Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
