i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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