Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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