That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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