Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
