therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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