how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
