He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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