On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
