you guys were way drunker than both of me
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
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