Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
