I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize