dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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