Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
