: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
