I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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