Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Randomize
