I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
