I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
