When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
