Kareoke will never be a sober sport
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
