I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
