Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
